Building for the Future provides support to lots of families of disabled children. Here, we share the story of single mum Lucy Walton. She talks about the past and present challenges she has faced bringing up William, 5, Emma, 14, who has global learning and co-ordination delays, and Polly, 11, who is on the autistic spectrum.

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Gorgeous Boy
autism as a mother sees it

Wednesday 2nd April World Autism Day - Gorgeous Boy. Hi. My Mum has said ‘Happy World Autism Day' to me today. I think the lack of sleep is getting to her!!!!!
All I would like to say on Autism is that I am Gorgeous Boy first and foremost living with Autism . Each of us is individual with Autism affecting us in a very unique way.
This is why I need Building for the Future to be successful in Building for the Future aim. At least I would have somewhere to go and be accepted. Mum and I would get to leave the house, and she would not have to worry about me as I would be accepted for who I am and not looked at like I am from another planet.
I will be supporting Building for the Future and I hope you will too.
Thanks from Gorgeous Boy xxxxxxxx

Wednesday 2nd April World Autism Day. There have been lots on in the media today to mark World Autism Day - once again focusing on the success stories.
While this is good to see, people need to remember that there are a lot of young people living with Autism who face a lot more to get through each day. Each young person living with Autism is completely individual and unique in their own way.
This is why I need Building for the Future to be successful in its aim. At least Gorgeous Boy would have somewhere to go and be accepted. Gorgeous Boy and I would get to leave the house and I would not have to be on tenterhooks waiting for someone to be horrible to him. ( I am sorry everyone, but Gorgeous Boy still likes to go to the park; we just have to hope there is no one there.)
This is why I will be supporting Building for the Future and hope and pray it will be successful in its aim. I probably do not have to pray as you will be surprised how determined parents of disabled children are. Support Building for the Future too.

Tuesday 1st April 21.15pm. I have really rocked the boat tonight with Gorgeous Boy. He has had to leave the house twice after school to accompany me on errands. Not a happy chappy. Did not have enough time to do his usual routine coming in from school before the first errand. OOPs! Then take him out again. What am I thinking?

I am sorry Gorgeous Boy, it is called life. I do my best to try and do everything while you are at school .

Sunday 30th March 19.20pm. My psychic powers obviously worked. Summer has arrived today. Trampoline has gone up. Back door open and we have extended into the garden today. Still do not need to buy a lawnmower as Gorgeous Boy pulls up all the grass.

Saturday 29th March 16.35 pm. Gorgeous Boy is very mischievous today. Very flappy and hyperactive. Sometimes you just have to go with the flow and tidy up Monday morning when he is back at school - especially when we are imprisoned at home due to the horrendous weather. Roll on summer and to getting in the garden.
I suppose most people would go to the cinema on days like today. I do not think the other cinema goers would want to watch Tots TV or Big Cook Little Cook, would they?

Friday 28th March 19.55pm. Gorgeous Boy is tired and has been all chilled and cuddly and soppy this evening. Then he decides he wants a coffee. Trouble is he hasn't got a cup or spoon and just empties the whole coffee jar contents on the side in the kitchen. He obviously needs more practice on how to make a cup of coffee!!!!!!!!!!! I will put it on the list of what he needs to learn: how to make a coffee; how to speak; how to use the toilet etc.etc.etc

Thursday 27th March 15.30pm. I have had to think a lot more about life and bringing up Gorgeous Boy since writing this Blog. Perhaps we as parents are focused on getting through each day relatively successfully that we just take it for granted what we do when looking after our children. We do so much more than the average parent of a child without a disability that when you stop and think about it we are ‘super parents', and therefore deserve so much more respect and support than we actually get.

I like hearing success stories about young people with Autism, but sometimes the media make it seem like success comes easy and applies to everyone. There was a young boy on ‘This Morning' once and I think a film was made about him how where his parents brought him a dog and soon after that he started to talk.
I could go out and buy 101 Dalmatians for my Gorgeous Boy and he still will not talk!!!!! He will always be my Gorgeous Boy though

Wednesday 26th March 22.10pm. I feel like a grown up staying up this late. Gorgeous Boy is at his overnight break from me so have not had to put him to bed. It has been a good day today apart from having not seen him since this morning. When you have a child with Autism you seem to have to spend a lot of time in meetings about them. It was so nice to be in a meeting today with people that listen and have Gorgeous boy's welfare and happiness as their top priority.

Tuesday 25th March 17.35pm. Gorgeous Boy is being a bit whingey this evening. He is getting a bad cold . I wish he could tell me exactly what is wrong and exactly what he is feeling. My psychic powers have to come back in to use. Nine times out of ten I can usually predict how he is feeling and alleviate his problems. I still hate it when I can not make it better the tenth time. I know he only cries for a reason. Its his only way of telling me something is wrong. Trying to convince other people over the years that is the case has proved rather hard at times.

Monday 24th March 20.10pm. I have had a realisation today that I am not on my own. Gorgeous Boy likes his food presented in a certain way .Brown bread must be a certain make and only strawberry Jam on it. Toast can only be white bread and must have butter on before the jam. Had a note from a friend today telling me her severely autistic nephew will only eat jam sandwiches with a certain type of bread and a particular make of Strawberry Jam. It made me feel like I am NORMAL and both the Gorgeous Boys have Mums that just want to look after them and make sure they are happy.

Sunday 23rd March 17.50pm. I feel very happy. I have managed to engage Gorgeous Boy in a shape sorting activity(one that a six month old could do) plus posting some plastic coins in a slot. He has done both about four times each! Plus he played with his parachute for about 15 minutes with Granny, big Brother and myself.
I probably should be embarrassed to admit how happy that I feel with what we have achieved today but I am not. Gorgeous Boy does have learning disabilities though. Also a lot of our children on the spectrum do not like to do activities that they associate with a certain place ie school.

Saturday 22nd March 20 .35pm. I had put some washing on today and in no time it was finished. Gorgeous Boy has worked out that by pressing lots of buttons on the washing machine it makes lots of red lights appear. He has been a bit of a walking disaster movie today. Toothpaste smeared over a bedroom window. Wet flannels left on beds. Has been auditioning to become a Morris dancer , jumping around with a baby wipe in each hand!!!! I have had other things on my mind hence disaster movie. Gorgeous Boy has to be my top priority at all times or I end up losing control.

Thursday 20th March 16.30pm. Have had four kisses and hello squeals and that is before we even get to our front door. He has arrived home from school after he is dropped off by his bus. Feed me woman. Get my telly on . Help me get my shoes off. "Yes sir. I am your slave." More kisses more cuddles.
I am just getting what I need Mum.

Wednesday 19th March 21.15pm. Yes, I know it is my thinking time of the week. I had to attend my older child's parent consultation with his school today. He is doing very well. I am desperate for him to achieve his full potential to stand him in good stead for his future. FUTURE is something I am too scared to contemplate for Gorgeous Boy. As for achieving his full potential, trying to get what ever he needs is as hard as trying to run a marathon in flip flops.

Tuesday 18th March 17.30pm. The craving I have to hear him speak never leaves me.
Tonight he was babbling away making really nice sounds and looking at me. It was so sweet.
Oh well, at least he gets a 20 minute once a week group session with a speech therapist! Some children get no speech and language therapy at all - even when their statement clearly says that they are entitled to it!!!!!

Monday 17th March 18.50pm. Move over Andrex puppy. You can only unroll the toilet roll. I bet you can not tear it up into as many small pieces as Gorgeous Boy can. I thought it had snowed in the play room tonight.

Sunday 16th March 17.05pm. We are on the homeward stretch of surviving another weekend. Gorgeous Boy can see his tea cooking in the oven which makes him very happy. Now we need to work on trying to make him understand that it has to be cooked properly before he can eat it. Distraction methods are failing miserably as he has taken me to the cooker by the hand rather a large number of times. I suppose if he could talk he would be moaning "MUM I am hungry .When is my dinner ready?"

Saturday 15th March 18.26pm. Someone is tired today and it is not Gorgeous Boy even though our day started at 4am. We had a slight defecating problem in the early hours. I must apologise for keep mentioning "The Defecating Problem". Unfortunately it seems to be a common problem among our Autistic children. Even the ones that are toilet trained.

Friday 14th March 19. 40pm. I am not to sure whether if I should call him Gorgeous Boy anymore. Perhaps Horror Chops might be more appropriate this evening. He seems to be rather craving sensory experiences tonight. I just wish it did not involve him emptying out my whole jar of Canderel in his play room. Our house smells very sweet tonight!

Thursday 13th March 19.24pm. The love of my life is back. I would just like to say that I have two gorgeous boys (the other not being on the autism spectrum but most definitely the other love of my life). He has been such a precious gift to Gorgeous Boy having him as an older brother. Gorgeous Boy and I are so lucky to have him. Earlier I was washing up and Gorgeous Boy came out to the kitchen and took me by the hand to the settee to sit down with him to have a cuddle. I am so lucky.

Wednesday 12th March 22.35pm. Gorgeous Boy has gone for his overnight rest from me. It is good for him to realise that he can take care from other people apart from his Mum. I know he has a very caring person looking after him tonight. The trouble is that it gives me time to think! Why is everything such hard work when you have a disabled child? All we want is to give them the best possible chance like everybody else.

Tuesday 11th March 20.20pm. Gorgeous Boy has come home from school tonight and the whole world is a wonderful place for him today. He is full of laughter and smiles. No, I do not always know what he is laughing at as he does not share the joke. It is private in his own world.

Monday 10th March 18.30pm. Putting Gorgeous Boy to bed last night was horrendous. I have a mattress on the floor beside his bed where I lay until he is asleep. Unfortunately he started crying and got very upset and distressed. This is when I find it very difficult. I calmly talk to him in a soothing manner. I try to comfort him with a cuddle to help pacify him. He pushes me away and I am not allowed to touch him or be near him. It is hard when Gorgeous Boy is like this. I am his Mum and I should be able to make things better.

Sunday 9th March 21.15pm. Yippee do. It's nearly bedtime and another weekend has passed. I spend most of my weekend feeling like I have let Gorgeous Boy down. The weather is a bit naff and there is only so many things we can do within our four walls called home. I always try to play and interact with Gorgeous boy. The trouble is his concentration level is very limited. We interact on a tickle game, that's it now he has finished , took all of four minutes. Back to watching Cbeebies and flapping with things.

Saturday 8th March 18.35pm. It is as though one becomes psychic once you become a parent of an Autistic child. I am cooking tea and Gorgeous Boy goes upstairs . "Can you go and check on gorgeous boy please?" I ask. Three times I say it, on the fourth I go upstairs myself. Too late. We have a defecating problem. You see, I am bloody psychic.

Thursday 6th March 21.30pm. He is back . I get so many smiles and kisses as he has missed me. It does not make me feel guilty. In fact I feel rather lucky that he is so happy to be back with me. So many children on the autistic spectrum do not give two hoots who is giving them the care they need. They are normally too busy in their own little world. Oops silly me was not watching him for 2 minutes. He defecated and threw it all out on his play room floor. Bless him . He is still my gorgeous boy.

Wednesday 5th March. Nothing to report as gorgeous boy is at overnight respite. I do miss him though!

Tuesday 4th March 20.00pm. I have been without my gorgeous boy for nearly 10 hours. He has been on my mind continually. I pick him up from after school respite and receive the biggest hug and smile to say Hello. This is how he communicates with me as he can not actually talk.

Monday 3rd March 17.40pm. My gorgeous boy hops and skips to school. He is 11 and a half but I have to hold his hand at all times. He can be unpredictable with no sense of danger. I must keep my gorgeous boy safe.

Sunday 2nd March 20.35pm. Today was Mother's Day. My brother and one of my sisters with their respective families took My Mum out for Lunch. I was not invited. Probably something to do with me having an Autistic son !!!!. We never get invited anywhere.